An Irish priest decides to take a walk to the pier near his church. He
looks around and finally stops to watch a fisherman load his boat. The
fisherman notices, and asks the priest if he would like to join him for a
couple of hours. The priest agrees. The fisherman asks if the priest has
ever fished before, to which the priest says "no". He baits the hook for
the priest and says, "Give it a shot father" .
After a few minutes, the priest hooks a big fish and struggles to get it
into the boat. The fisherman catches a glimpse of it and says "Whoa, look
at the size of that fucker!"
Priest: "Uh, please, the lord is watching would you please mind your
Fisherman: (THINKING QUICKLY) "I'm sorry father, but that's what this fish
is called - a fucker!"
Priest: "Oh, I'm sorry - I didn't know."
After the trip, the priest brings the fish to the church and spots the
Priest: "Look at this big fucker"
Bishop: "Please, mind your language, this is a house of God."
Priest: "No, you don't understand - that's what this fish is called, and I
caught it. I caught this fucker!"
Bishop: "Hmmm. You know, I could clean this fucker and we could have it
So the Bishop takes the fish and cleans it, and brings it to the Mother
Bishop: "Could you cook this fucker for dinner tonight?"
Mother Superior: "My lord, what language!"
Bishop: "No, sister, that's what the fish is called - a fucker! Father
caught it, I cleaned it, and we'd like you to cook it."
Mother Superior: "Hmmm. Yes, I'll cook that fucker tonight."
Well, then the Pope stops by for dinner with the three of them, and they
all think the fish is great. He asks where they got it.
Priest: "I caught the fucker!"
Bishop: "And I cleaned the fucker!"
Mother Superior: "And I cooked the fucker!"
There's absolute silence, and the Pope stares at them for a minute with a
steely gaze, but then lets out a huge fart, takes off his hat, puts his
feet up on the table, lights up a spliff, pours himself a large whisky and
says, "You know what? You cunts are alright."